Book Review: “Good Inside” by Dr. Becky Kennedy
Parenting can feel like a never-ending journey of trial and error, second-guessing, and a constant search for the “right” way to handle challenging moments. In a world where parenting advice is often contradictory or overwhelming, Dr. Becky Kennedy’s book Good Inside: A Guide to Becoming the Parent You Want to Be offers a refreshing, grounded approach to raising children that focuses on empathy, understanding, and positive connection.
Dr. Becky, a clinical psychologist and parenting expert, is well-known for her Instagram platform, @DrBeckyAtHome, where she shares practical advice for navigating the complexities of parenting. In Good Inside, she takes these concepts a step further, providing a comprehensive framework for parents to cultivate a deeper connection with their children while also maintaining their own emotional well-being.
The Core Philosophy: You’re Good Inside
One of the most impactful aspects of the book is Dr. Becky’s central philosophy: "You’re good inside." This simple but profound message aims to help parents understand that they are not defined by their mistakes, and neither are their children. It encourages self-compassion and reminds parents that, despite the challenges, they are fundamentally "good inside," and that their children are, too. This approach helps parents release guilt and judgment, both of which can hinder effective parenting.
The idea is that, instead of focusing solely on “fixing” behavior, we should look at the deeper emotional needs behind it. When children misbehave, it’s often a sign that they are struggling with something internal — whether it's feeling unheard, tired, or overwhelmed. By recognizing and validating these feelings, parents can create a space for emotional growth and better behavioral outcomes.
Practical, Actionable Guidance
One of the strengths of Good Inside is its practical, actionable advice. Dr. Becky doesn’t just theorize about what makes a good parent; she provides concrete strategies that parents can implement in real life. From navigating tantrums and sibling rivalry to fostering empathy and resilience, the book is full of tools and techniques that can help parents connect with their children in a meaningful way.
For example, Dr. Becky introduces the idea of “two feelings,” which encourages parents to recognize that a child can experience multiple emotions at once. By validating the child’s feelings and modeling how to process and name emotions, parents can help their children feel understood, while also teaching emotional regulation. The concept is powerful in its simplicity and is a reminder that every child, just like every adult, is complex and multifaceted.
Fostering Emotional Intelligence
Another key element of Dr. Becky’s approach is the focus on emotional intelligence. She believes that helping children understand and navigate their emotions is one of the most important things parents can do. This doesn’t mean shielding them from negative feelings but rather teaching them how to handle frustration, disappointment, and sadness in healthy ways.
Throughout Good Inside, Dr. Becky emphasizes the importance of leading by example. Parents are encouraged to show vulnerability, model emotional expression, and demonstrate problem-solving skills. The idea is to create a safe emotional environment where children can develop their own emotional toolkit, rather than feeling overwhelmed or lost when strong feelings arise.
Compassionate Discipline
When it comes to discipline, Dr. Becky advocates for a compassionate, connected approach. Rather than using punitive measures, she encourages parents to focus on understanding the underlying reasons for misbehavior and using discipline as a way to teach rather than punish. This doesn’t mean being permissive or lacking boundaries — instead, it’s about being consistent, fair, and grounded in love.
The book offers guidance on how to handle moments of conflict with patience and grace, ensuring that parents can stay calm and connected even when they feel frustrated or angry. The goal is not to suppress emotions but to teach children how to handle their own big feelings while also learning that they are safe and loved even when they make mistakes.
A Refreshing, Relatable Tone
Dr. Becky’s writing is warm, relatable, and filled with empathy, which makes her advice feel both accessible and practical. She doesn’t present a one-size-fits-all solution but rather invites parents to find their own path while keeping their core values in mind. She is quick to remind readers that there’s no such thing as a “perfect parent,” and that small steps toward improvement are what matter most.
Additionally, the book is peppered with real-life anecdotes and examples, which help parents see how these principles work in real situations. Whether it's dealing with a toddler’s meltdown in the supermarket or helping a teenager navigate peer pressure, Dr. Becky’s examples resonate with the everyday struggles that many parents face.
TL;DR
Good Inside is an insightful, heartening, and practical guide for parents who want to foster strong, healthy relationships with their children. Dr. Becky Kennedy’s approach is rooted in empathy and understanding, offering parents the tools they need to navigate the complexities of raising emotionally intelligent and resilient children. Whether you’re a new parent or someone with more experience, this book will remind you that the journey of parenting is not about perfection, but about being good — and kind — inside.
Dr. Becky’s book is an essential read for anyone looking to connect more deeply with their children and navigate the challenges of parenting with more grace, patience, and love.